I have made a decision.
I don't know what it is about blogs that makes me want to overshare, but starting tomorrow I'm going to start thinking of memories that are actually, like, interesting, like the week I set up a lot of profiles on dating sites, or the time a robot tried to chat me up on facebook (but I figured him out, no worries!), or the time a mob of children chased me through the zoo shouting "Foreigner! Foreigner!"
Or maybe I'll explain "Jezebel".
Or talk about the time I turned my back in China and my tour group got sucked into a black hole and I had to wander around a silk worm factory by myself until they found me.
Or the many times my skirt has fallen off on-stage (it was twice, but still).
Or how I used to use tricks my dad taught me to trick him with fake progress reports in high school!
Or the time a homeless man tried to convince me he knew where twenty-thousand dollars was hidden (and I sort of believed him).
Man, I could be so much more interesting.